unnamed unknown

I'm stressing a bit over the living situation. It's time to find a new place. I'm trying to find a place to buy, someplace that I can make feel more like a home. Unfortunately, I am uncomfortable with anything that feels too urban. I was raised a suburban kid and I guess that hasn't changed. I just feel my anxiety increase when I am surrounded by a bunch of pavement and cars. I need to separate myself from all that stuff in order to feel sane. Ballard is just not gonna cut it in that regard. Some areas of Ballard might work but those are not the locations where the affordable homes are.

I was spoiled growing up in such a quiet, calm, suburban neighborhood. It was clean, well kept, green, attractive, on a very quiet street and several streets away from any other busy streets. These are the things I associate with feeling relaxed and at home. I actually find it almost despicable that I'm such a spoiled suburban kid and can't deal with neighborhoods that aren't quite as neat and clean.... but it is what it is.

So, I have to deal with the reality of who I am. I only feel comfortable in a clean, quiet neighborhood, with grass and trees... That's what I need to find... It's just not easy to do in Seattle (affordably)... Am I going to need to go over to West Seattle? Or the Eastside? Frankly, either one of those would make for a shitty commute to the new Amazon campus. Sometimes I really wish for a simpler life in a simple town... Seattle is great, but the only neighborhood I feel like I'd be comfortable living in is Queen Anne...

It's too bad, cuz I saw a few really nice townhouses in Ballard (that I could've afforded). Just wasn't comfortable with the neighborhood.

Now I'm down on this home-search process. Fuck.